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9:49 am

ok... I got lazy yesterday and didn't writ in here... and that time change in really messing with my inner clock.... I think my platue is over I put on some pants today that have been too big for me , but today.. it was just way way too big.. and I only wore them two week ago..... but.. my tomtom.. had a hour of free time on Sunday between meeting and gave it to me... he is so swwet.. and was willing to be late if I needed him... no I didn't let him be late... but we talked of the fetish Ball I am going to.. he has never been to one either... but we will see if we can find one when I come to NY.... he goes into trance just as fast as J does... but he is more submissive.. not the J isn't cause J is so loyal.. I never doubt him... not that I am doubting tomtom.. but I see myself getting attached to him.. and I don't really trust that.... trust him in a way not to leave me... that is the gift that puppy left me.... I lack of trust in that....but I am trying very hard not to go there...

as for my diet.. well this morning I looking at my thighs.. and just went yuk.. so that is my new focus.. and it is time for some bike riding... I will start tonight in that gym in my building, maybe a little walking I can't really run as I have a bad knee and it gives out on me at times.... as big as I am can you believe I use to dance.. like in taking tons of classes and drillteam.. if you don't know what a real drillteam try here or a better place would be Here these are real teams and I did this for a long time back in that day... when I was thin and super limber.... but I am working on it *smile*