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11:40 pm

you know I was talking nita last nite and we were both talking about our fears.. I know that sometimes to a lot that know me (face to face) not in here , that I don't have a lot of fears but this is really not true I have plenty... but the topic that came up was..

"What is that worst thing someone can do to you emotionally?"

and I use to think that lieing was the worst and at one time it was.. but I have learned that sometime people just do this.. they don't do it to be me and don't always realize why.. but that is no long the worst..

the worst now is one I never wanted to admit.. it has always been there.. being abandon.. that is that worst thing anyone can do to me... and it happens ever so much.. and it never fails to tear me up inside everytime.. I am raw every time it happens and I don't know how to protect myself from it.. like now