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11:56 pm

ok why do I feel rejected... maybe cause I called mid day and go no answer.. called his work and he wasn't there, called later and the line was busy , and then a little later and no answer....

I have already been dropped

*sigh*.. if I move too fast its worng if I don't go fast enough its wrong... tomtom suggested that I try not to get so attached... he is right.. but I don't know how to do that.. I don't know how to not care.. I just not made that way.. which prob why I like to talk online so much.. gives me a little distance

I know I am possessive and clingy... I want to talk all the time... I stop myself from call anyone and everyone everyday....

its funny I hate with a passion being alone... and I am always alone..

but its my fault.. I forgot to watch to that shoe... I let my guard down and boom it hit me in the back of the head, as always

*sigh* on the good side this is why I didn't scene with him.. cause if I had and this had happened.. it would hurt right now I am feel more sad and rejected... but not big time hurt

gee I didn't even get to the 4 month mark....

I always tell them that I am not a one man woman.. in a way that is true... I use to be... til I learned that it never last...that funny thing is I could be.. but they always leave