What I am Listening to:
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3:03 pm

well being up for half the night reading and listening to my neighbors have sex.. can make onr do a lot of thinking.. one that I am having cramps too bad to even want sex.... but I wish there was someone to cuddle with or care about in that way I want to... my pet would do that if he were with me of that I have no doubt.. its one of the reasons I adore him.. he gives me intimacy on such a deep level... I know that he has limits... but I also know I could push them....

then there is spin who I also adore *smile* how do I put into words what he gives me.. he pushes me in a way.. its almost a battle of wills at times.... and just when he is on that edge of truely making me angry with him he will do something that just melts me....

there are others like dave and jon and my doubting thomas *smile* who make me think and smile and who know I think of them as true blue friends.... but I also know that don't go thought the day thinking of me... needing me, I not sure if they know that I need someone to need me.... not sex.. or not only sex.. but to need to want to just be around me

i'm not sure if I have ever had that, with anyone ever...

but when ever I am asked want do I want that is the first thing that always comes to mind