What I am Listening to: Slow like Honey- Fiona Apple
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12:31 pm

you know I wonder sometimes how things can change so fast...

as for spin I still don't know what to do about you... you throw me for a loop all the time... I worry about messing up your life... but then life is messy and sometimes I just want to know how much so... messy can be good...you in a short amount of time have learned to push my buttons... you tempt me to move beyond limits that are there for your own good... lets just say you are walking a very very fine line....that you act and treat me like some rare jewel that will be taken away from you...tips my scales big time.... you think sometimes that it makes me lose control...and that in a way is true, but not in the way you think

I am of the nature to go too far that is something I have always known about myself... when I first became a Dom I would never do pain.. cause I knew that with it being so new I would go too far.. and I had to stay away from that subs that would let me.. and yes there are subs that will not say stop...

so I picked control of the mind.. as I am a thought person...you know us air-signs... but I have found that control of the mind I can go much much farther.... you wonder why you can be obsessed?... cause I can be... I couldn't bring it out in others if I didn't know what it feels like...

also about the other day... I am not always that self conscience... but if it didn't matter to me what you thought I could would have shown you more than you asked for, and not of cared a bit... but I do care what you think...and that makes me nervous.... plus I forget a lot of the time that I am not as big as I use to be.. that is one thing I am still working on mentally its only been 9 months.. and I'm still on a diet...

so just bare with me on that one...