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12:35 pm

Ok been trying all morning to find some time to write this, between work and subbies... all my online time is being eating up.. but I know that it only for now it will slow down after a bit....

first I would like to thank everyone for all that nice notes they have left me...

and I would also like to thank Brian for his mention in her journal...

in fact not i don't mind at all that you used me as a example... in fact I total agree with you on the dependecies of the sub and Dom... many do see it as working one way and that is not true at all.. in fact i think for it true work in that long run or the 247 it has to be both...... I do depend on baby.. and he on me and he knows it works both ways.. to the fact that he let me know that he can't talk to me on IM for a while he ask me if I would be ok....

I think that some subs forget that Doms are people and not one I don't care who you are is always a fully independent, stabile, completely self-assured person all the time no one is that 247 the world is just not made that way.. I know for a fact that I'm not that, I don't see myself as beautiful... or even sexy most of the time... but if I view myself though baby's eyes...I can become that person.. and that is not to say that I'm not that person anyway... but sometimes that bad stuff is easier to see... and he knows I doubt myself in that... so he goes out of his way to always make me feel like I am that most beatiful woman he has ever seen...

and it has been my experience that in some way Doms are more if not the most needy between the two

in fact one of the reasons I keep this journal and let it be open for subs to read.. is so that they can see that I have a human side that is needy and wanting, can be hurt and can cry... too many get caught up in that fantasy and forget that behind that strong powerful woman who looks like ice won't melt in her mouth is someone who wants to be loved just like anyone else